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Jupiter Sunrise Forum    Talk    Talk Amongst Yourselves    Writting « Previous topic | Next topic » Pages: 1 ... 34 35 36 37 38  ...  48 Reply Notify of replies Send Topic Print    Author  Topic: Writting  (Read 6464 times) stars_at_night YaBB Senior Member     Gender: Posts: 351 Re: Writting « Reply #525 on: Nov 4th, 2003, 1:44pm » Quote Modify I'm not much of a poetry writer, I definetely prefer creative writing, but I want to hand a piece into my lit magazine and don't have time to do a story. I may submit this piece, but would adore some of your feedback, cause I suck at this game   Untitled   You say I'm fine the way I am that you love me for me, but I can see it in your eyes that you wish I were someone else   someone pretty and perfect smart and focused someone I am not   you look right at me but at the same time, right through pretending I am someone else someone worthy of your love   and when you say my name you pretend it belongs to someone else someone who isn't me   and when I'm gone, will you pretend it's someone else who left, someone worthy of your tears? or will it be someone else in your memories? will that girl holding your hand have my face?   So I'll allow you to pretend I'm someone else as long as that someone is worthy of your love and I'll be ok when you say my name and see someone else's face as long as it's my hand you hold.   And you can pretend I'm someone else when you say that you love me as long as I hear those words ***   thanks kids<3 « Last Edit: Nov 5th, 2003, 11:10am by stars_at_night » IP Logged -beth- just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #526 on: Nov 4th, 2003, 1:51pm » Quote Modify wow... that....was ...really good   rock on IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles Folkien YaBB Junior Member Shhhhhh! I'm hunting waskly wabbits!     Gender: Posts: 58 Re: Writting « Reply #527 on: Nov 5th, 2003, 7:30am » Quote Modify I sit here all alone, with a knife in my hand and noone else is home. Depression take over my mind as i sit and stare at the phone, cuz i know that i need help.   but the old familiar pain is calling, calling to me.............. its call is getting hard to resits, wanting to welcome me back into its vicious embrace.     -jakob IP Logged NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #528 on: Nov 5th, 2003, 8:29am » Quote Modify wow  that was really good... depressing, but good IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles JewJewBENjupsun YaBB Senior Member Take the leap, and find true happiness     Gender: Posts: 471 Re: Writting « Reply #529 on: Nov 5th, 2003, 9:00am » Quote Modify Beth Thats great....sad...but great, I totally can relate to it IP Logged ~*Nicole*~ ********************* * East Coast girl attitude*~ Ryan ********************* "If I had my chance Id never let you go...I need ten more minutes with you"-KH NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #530 on: Nov 7th, 2003, 6:50pm » Quote Modify how is it so that just 20 minuets ago i felt like i wanted to curl up in a ball and cry and cry, just give up on everything and just stop, leave everything behind, not have to worry about anything, work, school, people, myself, just lay there and dissapear now all of a sudden im sitting here grinning like an idiot just at the thought of you, at the thought of next time ill see you, touch you, hear your whisper in my ear. So im glad i found you, you come and save the day when im feeling down you are my knight in shining armor       ok that was in a totally different style than im use to... but hey i kinda like it... ill call it..."changing moods" IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles Ashley YaBB God/goddess www.brianmay.co m     Gender: Posts: 3311 Re: Writting « Reply #531 on: Nov 8th, 2003, 6:45am » Quote Modify so this is something i just kind of threw together the other night, open mic, scott was sitting there right with me and this just came to mind... it's kind of the opposite of that one at the top of the page (which rocks by the way)   I know I couldn't ask any more of you beacuse you already do so much for me that I'm afraid I'll overflow/And I know I can't expect any more from you than you already give because being with you makes my dreams so/and I know who I am and I know that you know/because when you're around is when I let it show IP Logged Love dares you to care for the people on the edge of the night and love dares us to change our way of caring about ourselves. This is our last dance. This is ourselves under pressure. NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #532 on: Nov 8th, 2003, 7:18am » Quote Modify awww ash thats awsome IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles Ashley YaBB God/goddess www.brianmay.co m     Gender: Posts: 3311 Re: Writting « Reply #533 on: Nov 10th, 2003, 5:42pm » Quote Modify i thought the rest of you JSers (especially krist who likes steal me) might like this....   I'm not sure how to draw a path to get to moonlight.... Me neither, Ben. But when I look at the picture of Scott in the tree that's sitting on my desk I come up with all these ideas for how to draw a map so that we can get home or at least be together all summer. None of them seem to be plausible though, because really, can anyone draw that path through the moonlight? It's the same moon that lights up the night and changes us from one form to another when we're together. It's like we become something beautiful and are fused together into one beautiful ethereal body floating somewhere in that moonlight that the evergreen soldiers are pointing at in awe. The stars, still farther away from the earth than us, circle around, glittering and showing off our celestiality and all our angelic innocence and form. If you can find that shortcut along the stone wall, maybe you can see us too on the nights where the clouds aren't too thick. You'll be able to see the fireflies blink past Orion, and so will we. When we're together or apart, we're still the same childlike mind that marvels at the small miracles of astronomy (as he might say) or a deity (that i might say). We can shimmer and shine above the earth, above the physical universe somewhere in my mind's eye. Maybe this whole lifetime won't have to be spent yearning for more and we can just stay in the twilight that lingers longer than i'll be awake... i won't be awake for much longer... but i'll still see the moon, that beautiful fusion of our two opposite worlds, shining and burning its way through the dark... so come on... steal me and take me there in the silver light that surrounds his shape and makes him brighter than Islington to me. Let him steal me, and steal all the powers of the night to hold me encased in his arms as long as the moon stays up. Let's just sleep in the grass tonight. He can become my daydreams and my night dreams that never last. Before I once again start over, let me rest upon his shoulder. Is the love that I seek the love that I'm leaving behind for all of my dreaming? IP Logged Love dares you to care for the people on the edge of the night and love dares us to change our way of caring about ourselves. This is our last dance. This is ourselves under pressure. NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #534 on: Nov 10th, 2003, 7:05pm » Quote Modify dude ash.... i do believe the walken said it best   woOW! IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #535 on: Nov 11th, 2003, 12:37pm » Quote Modify you tip your hat down to me a sign of respect that is the key   You got this hat as a present it looks very good it has a purpose dent   so when you take off your new hat just for me it makes me feel special that is the key     yeah as we all know by now, i wrote that at the spur of the moment,"your new hat" sometimes the simplest guesture can make my day IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles RockChica02 YaBB God/goddess Actions are immoral, opinions are not.     Gender: Posts: 4144 Re: Writting « Reply #536 on: Nov 11th, 2003, 3:53pm » Quote Modify I remember that day with more colorful details than I ever wanted to remember. The way your eyes shifted, trying to hide yourself from my eyes. You were afraid of my reaction, but you didn't care at all.... your emotions were hard to read. You simply blurted out your news, that you were leaving. You told me it was for only a year, but I knew you were to go forever, you'd never come back to me. How easily you turned away and left me all alone. No real explinations, just pack your bags and leave. No need to finish high school, no need to think of your best friend, your ex-girlfriend, the girl who was in love with you. Four years later, I can still remember how hard I cried that night. I never wanted things to change, I never wanted to say goodbye. Four years have gone by, I wonder how it could've been. If you had loved me too, if you had cared for me at all. That day will always be in my mind, the day I lost it all. The day I lost you. IP Logged "Of all the shooting stars I knew, I never fell for anyone but you..."- Ozma "One night I met you as the rain glistened in the shine of your eyes."- Melee .irony.is.for.suckers. NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #537 on: Nov 11th, 2003, 4:00pm » Quote Modify *sneif snief*     bravo val... wonderfull*sniff* IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles RockChica02 YaBB God/goddess Actions are immoral, opinions are not.     Gender: Posts: 4144 Re: Writting « Reply #538 on: Nov 11th, 2003, 6:41pm » Quote Modify You're too kind. IP Logged "Of all the shooting stars I knew, I never fell for anyone but you..."- Ozma "One night I met you as the rain glistened in the shine of your eyes."- Melee .irony.is.for.suckers. NOXsucks30 YaBB God/goddess www.retroimg.co m   wicked awsome art     Gender: Posts: 4309 Re: Writting « Reply #539 on: Nov 12th, 2003, 12:20pm » Quote Modify im falling so fast the clouds are swirling around me im moving so fast but is it really a bad thing?   where is the ground? shouldnt i have hit it by now im moving like the wind flying twards the ground   im still not there and i dont think ill ever make it cause im falling so fast   and its not such a bad thing   "falling so fast" yep you guessed it, wrote it on the spot.... IP Logged And what you've got means such a lot to me Someone to love, Somebody new. Someone to love, Someone like you. ~The Beatles Pages: 1 ... 34 35 36 37 38  ...  48 Reply Notify of replies Send Topic Print Forum Jump: ----------------------------- General -----------------------------  - New Forum Warning! ----------------------------- Talk -----------------------------=> Talk Amongst Yourselves   - Questions for the Band   - Street Team Business « Previous topic | Next topic »

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