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Jan 16th, 2006, 5:41am

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Ashley
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Re: Writting
« Reply #420 on: Aug 29th, 2003, 11:39pm »
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kristine is the coolest, that story's rocking, keep it coming!!
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Love dares you to care for the people on the edge of the night and love dares us to change our way of caring about ourselves. This is our last dance. This is ourselves under pressure.
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Re: Writting
« Reply #421 on: Aug 30th, 2003, 12:00am »
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"If it's before 3 i'll call you.  Because 3 is really late."
 
2:53 and almost to that mark
which will mean it's "really late" as i heard you say
and you're fast asleep, past the spark
beyond the clouds in my sky, much too far away  
and i'm still sitting here wide awake
feeling like what was clear is completely opaque
like the clouds that keep the sky silvery grey
 
2:59 and only a week ago
we were folded into each other underneath a sheet
drifting off to sleep, not wanting to go
And now without you, falling to sleep is such a great feat
now i'm still sitting here all alone
with the feeling that what i should hold in my hands now is gone
like the stars that hide away in their retreat
« Last Edit: Aug 30th, 2003, 12:01am by Ashley » IP Logged

Love dares you to care for the people on the edge of the night and love dares us to change our way of caring about ourselves. This is our last dance. This is ourselves under pressure.
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Re: Writting
« Reply #422 on: Aug 30th, 2003, 6:39pm »
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ash, that was totally awsome.. reminds me of times i used to spend....eep..ive said too much *scampers away*
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And what you've got means such a lot to me

Someone to love,
Somebody new.
Someone to love,
Someone like you.

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wisensmart336
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Re: Writting
« Reply #423 on: Sep 1st, 2003, 10:21am »
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In the dark kitchen I wait. I wait for waiting one thing you never learn in school college or any other degree awarding institution is why at 5AM waiting five minuets seems to be eternity the ever long never breaking eternity.  
Standing by a window, cold;freezing. thoughts images and memories mesh and mold together to form a mental colage. The blank spots are filled and looking back things always seem better, even the bad times seem like the best time of your life compared to the current state or to the unknown future. friends leaving onward and upward towards better things away from this barren wasteland, NY AZ... all of them leaving, escaping and good for them. Others staying refusing to grow up, slowly becoming alcoholics and in their own way leaving. and then is the thought the combining factor the one thing that they all have in common. Me. my friends go on to bigger and better things even the drunks will beat me in this 'Game ' of life.  
Then after for ever my thoughts are intterupted but not forgot. and its time to go.
In a darkened kitchen at five AM waiting five minuets is an eternity.
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if the sun refused to shine I'd still be loving you.
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Re: Writting
« Reply #424 on: Sep 1st, 2003, 5:40pm »
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aww scott!!!! *single tear*  
beautiful...
scott...you rock!! cant wait for you to visit!!!
 
lying awake
not able to sleep
thinking of what has happened
why did it hurt me so?
 
i wish it didnt work out like this
i wish i could be happy again
like i once was
but its not that way.
 
ill just have to move on
on from this tradgey
why do i have to feel like this
why cant i be happy again
 
 
sorry... last night i felt all alone... and that just came out... happy again  Undecided
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And what you've got means such a lot to me

Someone to love,
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Someone like you.

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Mimi
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Re: Writting
« Reply #425 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:52pm »
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Its all started out when I was in pre-school. A boy for show-and-tell  brought in a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Costume. It included the colored mask of one of the turtles (Michelangelo, the orange colored one). It also came with a set of nun-chucks, arm bands, and elbow bands. Ever since that day I have been hooked on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.  
 In first grade I would walk to the Jewish Community Center from Columbian Elementary for after school activities until my parents got off work. One day I wandered down to the gym to see kids my age doing karate (which I later found out to be Tae Kwon Do).  A great big smile went across my face as I stood there, with my face smashed against the window, watching in amazement.  For many more Fridays to come, I would sit in the bleachers and watch.  Each time having my dad pick me up and telling him how much I wanted to join Tae Kwon Do -- Join so that I could be like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.  
 I honestly do not remember how long it took  me to convince my parents to sign me up, but they finally did,  my dad met Mr. Kim one  night after class to enroll me. I started the following Friday and I was given a package. In it was a white cotton gi (uniform) and a white belt (both I still have to this day). My first class was so great, so many emotions were running through my body and my mind.  
  The first tournament that I attended, was held at Burke High School,  right off 120th and Dodge ( my future high school). I saw Mr. Richard Borgeson break a lot of boards in the gym; it was very impressive. Mr. Borgeson was my instructor from the very beginning at the Jewish Community Center. He was then and still is now one of the best instructors that I have ever met and trained under. I not only looked up to him then when I was a child, but even now as a teenager/adult.  Mr. Kim was also a very frequent instructor during my time training at the JCC (Jewish Community Center). I really enjoyed the discipline that they both brought to class.
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Re: Writting
« Reply #426 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:54pm »
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I remember when I was a Pee-Wee white belt at the end of one of the Friday classes. My classes as a kid were held on Fridays and the best part was free-sparring. One class Mr. Kim decided that he would spar some of the students. With my hand in the air, bouncing up and down, I  wanted to spar Mr. Kim so badly.  As a young person I was very confident in my Tae Kwon Do abilities and more than likely a little too confident, even a little thingy
y.  It was a lot of fun to spar Mr. Kim even though I know he was definitely taking it easy on me (which was  probably  a good thing).  I still to this day remember Mr. Kim and myself sparring at the JCC; that’s how much of an impression it made on me.  
 My first competition was at Lewis & Clark Middle School , now right up the street from Kim’s Tae Kwon Do School. (Back in those days Mr. Kim was located on about 50th and Dodge). It was 1993, I was a Pee-Wee purple belt , and I was nine years old.  After that tournament I was the happiest kid in the whole wide world . I had received 3rd place in free sparring. It was my very first tournament that I had competed in and I won 3rd place! It was super cool. I still have that trophy on top of my computer desk.  
As a kid I would go to the public library quite often to check out paperbacks, magazines, and of course martial arts books.  I started just looking at the pictures and reading the captions. The first martial arts book that I read as a child was called Billy Learns Karate by Bill Wiseman. I first read it in kindergarten because it was a kindergarten level book. The first time I opened the book I fell directly into the story. It was an amazing book. It was also amazing to not only myself who loved and enjoyed the book so much, but I even amazed the school librarian by how many times I had checked it out. She just kept checking that book out to me, time and time again without any question. When we were asked in elementary school to do book reports, that was my book. Since I had read the book numerous times, I really didn’t have the need to read it again. I would just summarize the book and bingo, I’d be done with another assignment. Over the years I have checked that book out at the public library just every once in a while. Just to go back and feel the magic that I felt when I read it for the first time. Not too long ago, on a trip to Chicago, I told my mom that I would love to have my own copy of this book. Just to have it and to be able to read it anytime that I wanted to. After returning home from Chicago, I went on the internet and found a website that sells old, out-of-print books. I conducted a search for this book and sure enough I had found it. It was being sold by a out-of-print book company in Canada. I sent them an email with an offer to buy the book, they replied saying ok, sent me the total cost including the shipping and an address to send the money to. I sent my money off to Canada and sure enough about 3 weeks later, my book that I had wanted to own so badly was in my hands.    
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*A warrior who wears two swords at his side, but does not put the spirit of combat into his heart, is nothing but a peasent or merchent wearing the skin of a warrior*
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Re: Writting
« Reply #427 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:54pm »
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While I was in elementary school my family took many vacations. Two of the places I remember  quite vividly were San Juan, Puerto Rico and St. Petersburg, Florida. On both these trips I brought my uniform along in hopes of taking a couple of Tae Kwon Do classes while we were visiting. When we arrived at our hotel rooms, I would get out the phonebook and look in the martial arts section. I would look first for Tae Kwon Do schools and also for places that weren’t too far out of the way of where we were staying. After I chose some places my dad would call and ask if I could maybe observe or participate in a couple of classes. In both cities I was welcome to come into classes and take part. Both in Florida and especially Puerto Rico I saw major differences between how they were taught and how I was taught back home. The most notable was when addressing the instructors the students in both places would say either  Maim or Sir to show respect. I was not used to this. I also noticed that they had a lot more colored belts or ranks leading up to black belt. I really thought it was cool in Puerto Rico when I saw a belt that was both black & red. That was super cool. I also noticed that in Florida the Tae Kwon Do was much more of an Olympic style. In Florida the sensei would also write on the person’s uniform their name in Korean, which was amazingly cool, (the sensei wrote my name in Korean on my uniform while I was there, I still have it to this day).  
As a child I viewed Tae Kwon Do classes as not just as a sport but as an art. I was so serious about my training. I would get quite angry during some classes at the JCC because the other kids in class were just playing around and I felt that it was very disrespectful to those who really wanted to learn. I recently bumped into a pair of brothers that used to take Tae Kwon Do at the JCC, both whom have received their black belts already. When I was a kid my goal was to earn my black belt. Ever since I have been trying to accomplish this goal.  
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*A warrior who wears two swords at his side, but does not put the spirit of combat into his heart, is nothing but a peasent or merchent wearing the skin of a warrior*
Mimi
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Re: Writting
« Reply #428 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:55pm »
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I believe it was summer before 7th grade that I had to stop taking Tae Kwon Do. It wasn’t because I wanted to quit, but because my mom, manager of the AT&T phone center, lost her job. AT&T had decided that they no longer needed as many phone centers in the Midwest and she was put on a leave of absence, which basically bridged her time in case she ever decided to work out at the manufacturing plant, which at that time was located in Omaha as well. My life during those three years was kind of dull. I went to school, did my homework, read a lot of books, and did what I do normally besides going to Tae Kwon Do. In short those three years were really long and to me it seemed like five years out of Tae Kwon Do. These years off also set my goal of becoming a black belt back. Those three years while I was out of Tae Kwon Do were I believe the most frustrating years for me. When I told my mom that I was still very much interested in Tae Kwon Do as I was when I had started, she told me to go to different schools around town and compare them to Mr. Kim's methods. My dad and I did go to different schools and we determined that Mr. Kim’s methods were what we really liked. My mom and I went to Mr. Kim’s one day and  re-enrolled me. I was very eager to start back up again. Mr. Kim told my mom and I that because I did not keep my membership up-to-date I would have to start over. Mr. Kim also told me that even if I had kept my membership up-to-date, I still would have had my brown belt ranking, but because I was a Pee-Wee at the time I was only taught one form for each belt. (As adults you learn three forms per belt). If I were to test for my black belt as an adult I would have to know the forms that I had not been taught. So overall I would have had to go back and learn the forms that I was not taught as a Pee-Wee. I believe it was a good thing that I started over because I was definitely out of shape and I did not know the other forms.  It was very frustrating to my parents because we paid the testing fees when I was a Pee-Wee for all the belt testing up until brown belt and because I had started over, I had to re-pay each testing fee. In my parents eyes the testing fees were and still are a lot of money. Not only was it sweet to go back to Tae Kwon Do, but it was also a struggle later on to continue to go to class on a regular basis. Their were times where I just didn't feel like going to Tae Kwon Do for one reason or another and so that in my eyes was a difficult obstacle to over come. I also now had to spend hours on my homework, this also limited the times I could attend Tae Kwon Do class.  Another obstacle for me now is the amount of energy that I have to use to do Tae Kwon Do. As a kid I didn't have to worry about it. I had a lot more energy then, than I do now (yes, time is catching up to me). Recently I saw a girl who was the senior in class, she was tall, slender, and had brown hair. She reminded me of what I used to look like when I was young.
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*A warrior who wears two swords at his side, but does not put the spirit of combat into his heart, is nothing but a peasent or merchent wearing the skin of a warrior*
Mimi
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Re: Writting
« Reply #429 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:55pm »
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Over the years I have read many other martial arts books, too many to list at this time. One of my favorites has to be Bruce Lee’s book on Jeet Kun Do. I have learned so many different techniques from reading these books. Also by reading these books, I have learned how the different martial arts have originated, some of the philosophies behind them, and where they are studied today, if still being practiced. I have also learned a good deal of information about the peoples of East Asia. The different clans, emperors, and daimyos of both Imperial China and Japan. It is amazing to me that I started Tae Kwon Do because of my love of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and it has so to say evolved in to a fascination with the East Asian Cultures. I have continued to read books about the different martial arts, trying to learn as much as possible.  I don’t know what drives me to be so fascinated by the martial arts and its backgrounds/culture, but I am continually in search of new reading material. Someday I wish to travel to those places I have read so much about in books. Maybe even write a book about martial arts and where they came from.
  I am absolutely positive that it will continue for a long time. Just this past week my family and I were accepted to host a Japanese student for two weeks through a program at Iowa Western Community College in Council Bluffs, Iowa. While this student stays with us I hope to learn about his culture as well as teach him about ours. It puzzles me sometimes why the young oriental kids want to dress and act like us (Americans). We do have a cool society, a good democratic system (depending on what your view of “good” is). However, their culture is so much more interesting to me. It’s so much older and goes so much further back into the past than ours. Our society is so much newer or younger than anyone else is in the world. Yet they still want to be like us.  
 I have definitely learned, however, a lot of good lessons from movies that can be applied to taking Tae Kwon Do or any martial arts for that matter. For example, in the first 3 Ninjas movie, the grandfather, who is teaching his grandsons martial arts, mentions that one of the first rules of martial arts is one should only fight if they know for sure they are going to win. He shows them the pressure points on the human body (every time they hit a pressure point the stuffed dummy’s eyes would light up) and explains to them that they should only use these techniques as a last resort. Another example is in the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Movie the sensei of the evil foot soldiers tells one of his students during a lesson that he should never lower his eyes to an enemy. Thus giving any opponent or enemy an opportunity to defeat him. I believe these teachings to be somewhat true.
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*A warrior who wears two swords at his side, but does not put the spirit of combat into his heart, is nothing but a peasent or merchent wearing the skin of a warrior*
Mimi
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Re: Writting
« Reply #430 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:56pm »
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There have been good examples shown in history as well. Some of these teachings for example, King Louie the XIV of France said that one should keep his friends close, but keep his enemies even closer. The daimyos of Japan and emperors of China believed that one could never put full trust into any of his men, for fear of plots to de-throne him, so that they may seize power for themselves or their allies. All of these sayings and even examples in history apply to Tae Kwon Do, martial arts in general, and everyday life.
 I believe we as students should I believe have confidence that if a conflict should arise, we will be able to handle ourselves appropriately. I am also a very strong believer that we should only use these teachings for emergencies of self-defense, never just to show off, or pick a fight.  
This year I graduated high school and plan on attending the University of Nebraska at Omaha in the fall. Originally I wanted to go to college out of state because I was under the impression that U.N.O. was not that good of a school. Also because I really wanted at the time to get out of Nebraska. Since my brother is going to school out of state and it costs so much money I told my parents that I would stay home and go to U.N.O. for the first year.  Plus my brother worked while in high school, saved his money up, and has paid off half of his college tuition already. I on the other hand did not work through out high school and just concentrated on school work. So if I go to U.N.O. the first year, get my bearings on college, work a bit, and help out at home. I can save up my money so I can go to Chicago to finish off my schooling. I really enjoy Chicago. They have so much more culture that I believe we in Nebraska are lacking. While in college I will be majoring in East Asian Studies. I have decided that I am really interested in East Asian studies so why not pursue it further. Upon completion of my studies I do not know how I will make my living but I am positive that I will find something in my field that I'd enjoy.  
I have also learned that UNO has a Black Belt Club and Tae Kwon Do classes as well so that’s super cool. The Black Belt Club is a club for people who want to continue taking Tae Kwon Do while in college. You are not required to be a black belt. You can achieve higher ranks by learning their forms and taking their belt testing. They not only have classes every week but, competitions around the Midwest during different times of the year. I did want to continue taking Tae Kwon Do when I went to college. This is a good opportunity to not only continue Tae Kwon Do but also to learn a new style as well.  
  What I would like to accomplish in the future would be to get though my first year of college, continue taking Tae Kwon Do, and maybe move out of the house by next year. I believe that if I can do my best in everyday life as well as school then no matter what I do I will be not only successful, but happy as well.
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*A warrior who wears two swords at his side, but does not put the spirit of combat into his heart, is nothing but a peasent or merchent wearing the skin of a warrior*
Mimi
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Re: Writting
« Reply #431 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:56pm »
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The road has been a long one but a great learning experience. It also proves that it is much easier to just give up rather than to keep on struggling and working hard toward that goal. Patience in this light is defiantly a virtue. Strengths and weaknesses will always be around. The only thing you can do is to push yourself to improve your weaknesses. I think that in life its self you have your strengths and weaknesses. They are not just in Tae Kwon Do or any other hobby or sport that one may enjoy participating in.  
My weaknesses in Tae Kwon Do are probably my side kicks and my wheel kicks. Since I am so flexible I never really turn my butt/hip all the way around to do a proper side kick and my wheel kick my toes seem to be sideways most of the time instead of pointing straight up like they should be. Most of the time I do not realize that I am doing a horrible side kick, but Mr. Kim has been very persistent in pointing it out to me, lately. Mr. Kim yells at me I know that, “hey my side kick looks nothing like it should.” I have been working very hard on my side kick. Trying to make a conscious effort to think about the proper way to do a side kick. Then go through all the steps in my head while going though the actions. I have seen a difference in my side kicks ever since I started to try and do them correctly. My wheel kick I just need to use it more and if I do that I feel that I will get better. I feel that my real strength is my round house kick. When I do that kick I just relax and let it go. I think I enjoy the round house kick so much because I am so flexible.  I also enjoy double knife hand blocks as well as flying side kicks.  
I believe that if someone really wants to change a weakness they will do it. You cannot keep telling a person to change. It has to be that person to decide on their own that they need to change themselves in order to make themselves better at what they are doing. If they don’t want to change they won’t. That’s all there is to it.
I believe that studying Tae Kwon Do has made me a better person. When I started studying Tae Kwon Do I was a bit thingy
y. I would show off to my friends and just act like a kid that knew it all. Not only was it maturing in age, but maturing in action. The discipline that I have been taught in Tae Kwon Do has helped me not only balance out my home life, but my personal life as well.  
While in high school most kids would go out every night during the week and hang out with their friends, they would work, and they would attend sporting events. They would do everything, but there school work. Then when it came to the weekend they would do the same types of activities. The entire senior year of high school most colleges said was wasted on hanging out with friends and taking easy classes at school that did not require a lot of effort. Instead of taking classes that would better prepare a person for college. My entire year of senior year was spent studying. Every night with about four or more hours of homework. Two honors classes the entire year and projects about every other week for those classes. It was a constant up hill struggle my senior year to find time to even go out with my family for dinner, let alone go out with friends on the weekends. I was taking a foreign language of which the teacher did not believe that I could pass her class due to just barely passing her first year foreign language class. Advanced Placement World History, A.C.E. Academy (Architecture, Construction, and Engineering), Spanish 3-4, Algebra 3-4, Team Sports for Gym Credit, Earth Science, and English 7-8. It was everyday, every week, the entire year. I had no breaks besides those which everyone else had, if we went out of town I would have to make up the assignments that were given out when I was gone, and I had a tutor for Spanish so that I could pass her class and tell that teacher who did not believe in me that yes I can do it and your not going to stop me or discourage me. My senior year I had by far the hardest classes that I have ever had in my life and I earned good scores in each class. I am an average person when it comes to school. If given the opportunity to challenge myself I will dig right in. Always doing my best and striving to beat the odds that I may be up against.
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*A warrior who wears two swords at his side, but does not put the spirit of combat into his heart, is nothing but a peasent or merchent wearing the skin of a warrior*
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Re: Writting
« Reply #432 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 3:58pm »
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I just found that essay that I had written as part of my black belt requirements when i was preparing to take the test... I never tested, but i really like what i wrote and thought id share it.  
 
Srry it was so long, it had to be 15 pages, thats actually only 11 of the 15 pages, I couldnt save the other 4 pages, but they werent important, so i hope u guys enjoy what i wrote.  
 
Smiley Mims
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*A warrior who wears two swords at his side, but does not put the spirit of combat into his heart, is nothing but a peasent or merchent wearing the skin of a warrior*
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Re: Writting
« Reply #433 on: Sep 3rd, 2003, 5:35pm »
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Mimi, I really admire your dedication. It's awesome to see how far you have come through determination and perseverance. I think it's an inspiration to us all, regardless of waht our passions are. I only hope that we can be like you and keeping going when the going gets tough.
 
  david a. bauer
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Re: Writting
« Reply #434 on: Sep 10th, 2003, 4:48am »
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Scott-- that was awesome, i mean seriously... you hardly ever post stuff anymore but when you do it's like wow.  Kristine-- that was awesome too, everything you post on here rocks.  Mimi-- that was long but really awesome too!
 
Happiness is a lot like sadness and it's kind of weird beacuse most people consider them polar opposites.  WHen you think about it though, they're really almost alike.  I realized this the other night when I was walking around outside and instead of being in my own little world of self-pity and sadness, everything was making me happy.  When you're sad, when one little thing tips the scale to upset you, it seems everything adds to it and everything else that happens in some way makes you sadder.  One thing will start it and then before you know it, it's everything-- "I hate school," "I have no ambitions," "I can't be with you," "I don't get to see you for another whole week," and so on and so forth.  Happiness has the same effect.  When one thing makes you happy, it seems like everything is seen through that rose-colored lens and adds to the happiness.  One thing will start it and then before you know it, it's everything-- "I love Jupiter Sunrise," "I'm gonna be a rock star," "I get to talk to you," and "It's only a few more days till i see you again."  It's amazing how the tiniest things in life can change your entire perspective on things.  It's the difference between a night where everything goes wrong and a night where even things that usually serve only to piss you off end up making you happy.  Really, happiness and sadness aren't emotions, when you think about it; they're just perspectives, means of looking at things, a manner of thinking.  Any event can cause this manner to change.  In just a couple seconds, it can sway from "i hate my life" to "i love my life" in that completely bipolar way.  After a while you find that nothing has actually changed, only the way you look at things.  For you to change from sad to happy, it only takes a mental adjustment and suddenly the world is a more beautiful place where you're friends with your favorite band and you've accomplished things you only thought possible in dreams.
 
(inspired by a late-night phone conversation)
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Love dares you to care for the people on the edge of the night and love dares us to change our way of caring about ourselves. This is our last dance. This is ourselves under pressure.
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